Ali W. asks about humility and wanting to stay small. What a profoundly important question this is! The answer I want to offer is rooted in first looking deeply into the humility of God, since we are created in his image. Most people don't tend to see God as humble (except maybe in Lent), usually buying into the popular view of God as POWER, MIGHT, AWESOMENESS !
To Ali and to any other intense seeker of God I suggest you begin with Illia Delio's, "The Humility of God". She is a Franciscan Nun, and will lay out a feast for your soul in her writing. It is less than 10$ on Kindle. She will stretch your mind to embrace a cosmic-sized Christ, and help you see the humility of God as an icon of Who He Is, rather than just something he does. Don't skip the Introduction where she sets the foundation, and don't gobble the chapters to finish the book! Rather, read each line with the aim of actually understanding the subject as she does. If you do that, you will have opened the door to understanding how to stay small.
Sr. Delio's Franciscan approach goes on to a powerful world view that cannot help but change you. God bless you, and Buon Appétito !